Miraculous Cure-All: Your Attention

Every child is different, and every situation is different. The trick to parenting is that we are all beginners just doing the best we can with whatever situation we find ourselves in. THANK GOODNESS we are not alone! Prayer is a rare gem my friend. It has helped me MANY a sleepless night (and tear-filled day)!

One thing I have realized in my frustration, sheer panic, motherhood journey is that there is one thing that works on every child, no matter their personality/phase they're going through/etc. That is, spending one on one quality time with each child DAILY. Yep, daily.

This will look different for every child, and every parent. The KEY is to ASK your child what THEY want to do or to LISTEN to what THEY are ASKING you!

If you feel added pressure trying to schedule time into your day, remember that the laundry/dishes/email/whatever will still be there in 10 minutes, but this precious opportunity to create memories may not.

I can't tell you how many times my kids have BEGGED me to come play whatever with them while I was up to my eyeballs in dishes/laundry/toys/chaos. I used to respond with "let me just finish this" (like that's ever going to happen. It's never finished!) One day, after several "interruptions" (if THAT doesn't make me feel guilty, not much will. I don't ever want my kids to feel like they are interruptions!) I stopped what I was doing and gave my toddler my undivided attention. The smiles, giggles, and JOY that I felt in that moment was worth everything. After about 5 minutes, my sweet boy was distracted and our moment was over. I went back to doing dishes, and he ran off to the playroom. I was happy. I felt fulfilled. 5 minutes. That was ALL it took!

I promise you, if you pause what you're doing and listen to your kids and show them that they matter, you will not regret it. BONUS: You will also make some sweet memories.

So your task (and mine) for the day is to LET them be #1 on your list.

Need help scheduling one on one time? Try holding a weekly "family council". We do these on Sunday afternoon. Find more about that here.

Update: Just a few minutes after I typed this post, my son came in asking for something. I immediately jumped up and asked him what he needed. (I know this isn't always possible, but it was for me right then.) Turns out he wanted to download a new game that I didn't feel good about. We had a discussion, he was mad at me, but didn't act out. Although he was sad, and told me he was mad at me, I used the old cliché "I'm doing this because I love you and want to protect you." Guys, I think he really believed me! (Which is good because that was the honest truth!) The discussion ended with him choosing a book to read to me, and he ended up SMILING. I'm telling you, this attention thing REALLY WORKS!